Kelle's Dad

My friend Kelle's dad wrote me this email back in July of this year and I thought it was a beautiful story to share with you:

From Rik Cryderman:
You must know by now that Kelle and I share one heart so you need to know that you are in mine as well. I and all our family pray that your heart and arms someday are filled with the gift of a baby that will be blessed to call you Mom. Sustaining faith and hope while waiting can be a difficult thing. Hold on. Years ago, when, as Kelle might have told you, I "lost" my children for a little while, I prayed daily for them...that they would be safe, happy and protected from the wounds of all that was going on...and then, I would pray they would be in my life again. One day, I was reading a favorite passage of comfort in Isaiah 43...these were the words I would claim: "...Do not be afraid--I will save you. I have called you by name--you are mine. When you pass through deep waters, I will be with you; you troubles will not overwhelm you. When you pass through fire, you will not be burned; the hard trials that come will not hurt you. For I am the Lord your God, the holy who saves you...you are precious to me and because I love you and give you honor. Do not be afraid--I am with you! But that day, God seemed to whisper, "Read on!" and I did...and the next words were honey to my heart: "...from the distant east and the farthest west, I will bring your children home...I will tell the north to let them go and the south not to hold them back..." And I wept and I believed and I rested in the promise. It wasn't I that needed to work for it, He was working for me, on my behalf. It was not long after that moment that there was a knock on my door and I opened it to see a young man standing there...I sadly did not recognize him in the dim of the evening and, seeing he had ridden a motorcycle, thought he was at the wrong house, until he said, "I'm your son." I am believing with you, agreeing in prayer, standing at hope's door with a cradle nearby. Feel my prayers and love for you...another daughter. Blessings, Kelly, and faithful hope! --Kelle's dad.

My Reply:
Reading your words was like food to my soul. Thank you for sharing such a personal story of how you felt waiting for your children. We have that in common and it helped to know your prayers were finally answered. When I hurt, I have my faith. That is the biggest source of strength through all of this. It's hard to make sense of it, but here's my theory. I feel honored. Really honored! I didn't feel this way overnight, but it's been an evolution of a feeling. May sound strange, but I feel honored that God feels David and I are strong enough to handle the challenges and roller coaster of infertility. I feel honored that He has blessed me with a strong rock in my life as David is to me. I feel honored that He has given me so many blessings in my life and now says, "I have given you 30 years teaching you love, blessings, gifts, character, hope, strength, courage, faith to prepare for this test" and I know we are making Him proud! Your words helped us through our ectopic in September of last year as I was just getting to know your incredible daughter, as she wrote this to me and I still keep it close to my heart:
From Kelle: My dad sent this to me to share with you....I cried when I read it! He has helped a lot of families going through the exact same thing. He wrote:
The one thing I hold tightly too when such heart rending sadness sweeps over is to realize this tiny spirit, in it's brief visit to this world, knew only love and warmth around it--and from there went into God's wondrous heaven and His tender arms. It never had to learn of war, or hatred, terrorists, or cruelty....only knowing love. Mother Theresa once said, "the heart stretched out by sorrow, God will later fill with joy." I can send to you a little booklet I made with scripture verses and a prayer for those who have lost a little one. Again, it is a tribute to her mother's heart that already, she loved her baby--that there is a place in her heart that will forever mark the baby's visit to this world...and someday, when she enters heaven, she will recognize the little voice that says, "Welcome home, mommy, come see where I have been!"

I know God is molding the healthiest, happiest baby alive and we'll wait patiently for His magic, feeling honored the entire way. Thank you for your words, your caring, your heart and for molding Kelle into the internally beautiful woman she is today! I reap the benefits of all your hard work!!
Lucky Lady
Kelle has probably shared this already, but if not, here's a short story about a couple going through something similar...may help some of your current or future couples
http://www.vocalicious.com/empty_arms/empty_arms_mod.html