Saturday, November 21, 2009

October Milestones

While we were ttc, it seemed like life moved so slow and I was always waiting for something to happen. Like I was at a constant standstill. Like waiting for the next dr. appt, waiting for the next cycle, waiting for the next surgery, etc. It was hard not to fast forward and the movie Click really helped me with that concept, but it was still really hard to be patient.

Now that Lily is here, it seems like life is just flying by like a kite in tornado and I'm trying to soak in all the moments and slow everything down to a standstill. It's a crazy feeling to think back to that turtle-like pace life and not miss it one bit because it was so raw and heartbreaking, but that time also helps to put everything in perspective knowing nothing will ever be as hard as that time.

Nothing.

Because of that, I'm finding myself actually a little thankful for those 4 years of pain and heartache. Just a little.

She makes everything okay. 19 months later, I still can't believe she's here when there were times I lost faith and never knew we'd ever have a baby. I never fast forwarded to after the newborn phase (like walking, talking, playing, interacting) so this is all new dreams fulfilled, just gravy on the mashed potatoes. In her monthly picture, she's wearing new jammies from Grandma that reads "Dance. Smile. Dream." I think those are her 3 favorite things to do. Mine too. Thanks Grams!
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and our little Lils is quite the talker lately and it's blowing my mind. Truly mind blowing. That's all I can say. Asking for what she wants and what she doesn't want. Actually showing her opinions about what she likes and dislikes. (big eyes) What? in? the? World? (tried to blow up this page, not sure if u can read milestones)
Photobucket Translation if u can't read above:
--Said “owl” and “moon”. --Said “Brady” and “Help”. --Blows own nose. --Said “bus” and “Doctor”. --Pats own back while coughing. --Looks for moon all times of the day. --Covers mouth when coughing. --Taught friend sign language. --Said “What’s That?”. --Said “Bi-Fi” for “butterfly”. --Said “bye-bye”. --Said “mommy help”. --Falls to the ground tantrum. --Said “purple”. --“names 10 shapes”. --Said “mine”. --Said “diaper”. --Ate entire paper napkin. --Made up sign for “help”. --Asks to slow dance.

And our little Minnie Mouse has developed a borderline obsession with Grandpa. Ever since her Halloween fall, she's wanted him and only him when he's around. Follows him around with hands up in the air saying "up, up, up" or with a book as a lure for his lap. Be. still. my. heart. The other night, we were putting her to bed as he was at the door. I was walking upstairs with her half asleep on my shoulder, nuk in, heavy breathing and body in my arms as David answered the door and letting dad in. Well, once she got one look at him, you'd think we pinched her awake because she shot her head up, THREW the nuk clear across the room like she was disgusted with it, wanting nothing to do with it, and started crying with her arms outreached towards him. Ha.lare.ee.us! After some snuggles, she was ready for "nigh-nigh", but just had to get her Grandpa fix.
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in other random news, Lily was intent on stacking these creamers by herself and got these 7 on top of each other without any help from mom or dad. She'd clap after each creamer was added. We always bring her "restaurant backpack" full of special toys, but who needs those when you have coffee creamers and jellies to stack? ha
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and a random picture from her teacher showing us our favorite part of Lily: (think that's Leah in the background)
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I can't tell if she looks scared, busted or shy here, but it's cute either way. (no, she's not in time out jan-ha)
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She pinched her finger today in the dresser and came running to me, crying hard with arms up, saying "up" with her big blue tear-filled pleading eyes looking to me for kisses and comfort. I kissed her finger over and over, held her so tight, rocking her, telling her it'd be okay, how much I loved her and I could feel her sigh of relief as the pain disappeared and she laid on my shoulder longer than usual until she fell fast asleep in my arms like a newborn. She fell asleep out of nowhere in the middle of the day and it was heavenly. We laid together, as she slept heavily on my chest like a newborn and I knew I had made everything okay in her world. I had stopped the pain and made it disappear like a magician. I had hugged, loved, and kissed all her boo boos away and she was perfectly content.

Little did she know she has done the same thing for me. Time and time again.

8 comments:

wylie said...

I truly am amazed at how much she talks! The message I got from lily blew my mind! Lee loves her lil buddy :)

Kelle said...

ha ha ha....the creamers! and her little satisfied look of 'i did that.' she pulls of the piggies so well...it's so very 'lily.'

Jennifer said...

Tears at her kissing your boo-boos away. She has done that for all of us. (wiping eves on t-shirt)

I love the story of her reaching for Grandpa. How lucky we are that our kids have grandparents to experience, love, know, and remember.

I adore her personality.

ALREADY.

Every layer we peel back reveals such a beautiful person, even more than the day before.

This is SUCH a magical time for you!! You are soaking it in, as you should.

I love the mama you are.

xoxo
jc

The Brinkley's said...

What an awesome post. One question...What were you doing when she was eating an entire napkin??? Stranger things have happened!

Heidi said...

aw. look at how big she has become. she is like a real person now...like a real little girl with her own likes and preferences. she is such a pretty girl too!

boo boo story is so sinkin' sweet and i can so relate to those precious thoughts playing in your mind while they lay there longer than normal!

The Manrings said...

what a wonderful post with all of her october milestones and pretty mini mouse pictures!! love the story about her and her grandpa....sammy is exactly like that with her Pop Pop. she always has been and no one else compares when he's in the room. its really special. hope you guys had a great turkey day. always glad to check in to see all of lily's pretty pictures. xo
ps. this song....love it!

Grandpa said...

When I see Lily in her Minnie Mouse outfit . . . a warm feeling comes over me . . . and I know you know this is so true . . . ‘time files’ . . . and as Lily grows older each day . . . the ‘tail winds’ pushing her thru time . . . only seem to get stronger.

Mary said...

Jennifer talks about the "layers" of her personality. It is so special to see each one emerge. They are all so flippin' CUTE!!!!

That girl is one lucky child to have you and David for parents and that luck and love shows during all of her layers that we are fortunate enough to experience!!!!
Mom