Tick, Tock, Tick, Tock!!

The waiting game continues, but I'm doing ok with it. It may sound funny, but I'm SO scared to find out the results of the pg test, that I want to put it off as long as possible. I'm SO terrified that it'll be a negative test result that I'm willing to wait as long as possible. I dont want to know if it's negative. Of course I want to know if it is positive, but when I don't know, I still have hope that I can hold onto with every fiber in my body!!!! It's like I only want to know the results if we are indeed pg so we can celebrate like crazy, but the fear of negative test makes it ok to wait bc I still have hope. Hope is a good feeling!! Does that make any sense?

Progesterone Results...

Had a blood draw this morning before school to test my progesterone levels and they said it was at 47.4 which is "WONDERFUL"....man, do I love that word when it's matched with any lab results!! Don't know what that # means, but they seemed happy with it then so are we!! This has no effect on a + or - pg test, but helps if we are indeed pg. Progesterone helps build the lining of my uterus strong and sticky for any babies to grow and thrive and snuggle up in! I pray that there are 2 in there right now doing just that!! (kneeling on floor, pressing hands together) Of course we'd be happy with 1 too, but dont want to leave anybody out and get their feelings hurt! :)

The main reason why I'm happy they liked these results is because if they were too low, they might up the ante' on these shots to 2x per day and that would NOT be fun!! These shots are the worst of the bunch. This needle seems so long that I feel it should pop out the other side of my body when he puts it in!! I may be exxagerating just a tad, (ya think?) but that's what I visualize when I see it. I dont ever look at the needle, but I caught a accidental glimpse last night and it was shocking!

The progesterone is in oil so it's really thick and hard for David to push in! He said he gets A LOT of resistance when injecting it. EWWW!! He said it's comparable to pushing honey thru a syringe!! Hey, maybe that's why I'm so sweet!! ha ha....

I'll continue to get my progesterone checked until the day I get a call when they want to do the (drumroll please) PREGNANCY TEST! OH MY! They're not exactly sure when that'll be, but they'll let us know depending on how these tests go. We'll probably need to do it in Margate bc they have to use the same machines they've been using to measure my "Beta" to compare. OH DEAR! They said we can get results on the spot. DOUBLE OH DEAR!! I get butterflies just thinking about it!! Keep praying!! We're almost to the big test!! This is like the FCAT for Life!!! Probably another 2 weeks!! OH MY!!

Feeling Better Today...

We spoke to the nurse for a LOOONG time today about what happened to our potential snowbabies. They said only 20% of couples actually are able to freeze some embryos for future use which made us feel a little more in the "norm". They could survive if implanted in the uterus, but have difficulty surviving in the incubator and freezing process. They went over each embryo, its grade at every stage and their criteria for implantation and freezing. Looks like we had some close, but they wouldnt have survived the freezing or thawing process bc it's so strenous on those fragile embryos. She continued to stress that the level of embryos they implanted were the "best case scenario" and they could not have gotten a better score of 8.1 so that was reassuring. Feeling positive and happy, not so disappointed....still hopeful!! Keep praying!!!!!!! LOVE YOU!! XOXOXOXO

Roller Coaster Kids

No Snowbabies! :(

I just got the call from the nurse who said that our TEN EMBRYOS did not make it to day 5 which is when they freeze the strong ones. The uterus is a better place for them rather than the incubator so the 2 in me were very strong when they put them in so that's reassuring. David and I are STUNNED to say the least and very sad bc we wanted to do a 'frozen transfer' the next time (for future children or if this cycle doesnt work) which is less expensive and not as an intense process as what we just went through. We'll have to start all over next time at it. We don't fully understand it and are having a hard time wrapping our brain around it, but we're even more hopeful for a positive pg test in 2-3 weeks! Keep praying!! XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Pink or Blue?

Here's my outfit I wore for transfer day....I wanted to wear pink and blue so neither embie would feel left out!! ha ha

I'm home today and feeling great! No pain, no discomfort, no cramps.....just exhausted!! I can't sleep enough!! As soon as I wake up, I have the urge to go back to sleep!!!! We've had a hectic schedule the last few weeks driving back and forth to Margate so my body is trying to catch up from that plus all the "work" it has had done on it in the last few days needs some repair time. I just woke up (11:30) only cause the phone rang if you can believe it and I'm looking forward to eating a little lunch and going back to sleep!!! I slept nearly all day yesterday. I want my body to get as much rest as it's asking for!! Staying horizontal is the key!! Better to be safe than sorry!! Waiting to hear from the doc about how many of our embies survived to day 5 and will be frozen - they'll let us know today or tomorrow!! I hope a few survived in there!!

We keep talking to the twins and rubbing/kissing my belly like they're in there growing and living in there!!! I hope we dont find out we were talking to ourselves after this 2-3 week wait!!!!!! No matter what happens, we did all we could, it was incredibly bonding and it was an amazing process....one that we'll do again if need be!! WE LOVE YOU ALL for every prayer, every hope, every caring word, every card, every email, every ounce of love you give us!! The cards, emails, flowers will be saved forever and the feelings you've given us will be in our hearts forever!!!!!

PS Can't use my cell until friday for texts or talking - ugh! went over this month which I NEVER do....it was a unique month to say the least!!

2 PERFECT EMBRYOS!

Today was INCREDIBLE!!! They said our "embies" were doing great and thriving well in the incubator. They chose the strongest 2 which were rated perfect 8-cell - grade 1 embryos!! That's the best rating they could get! They passed their baby FCAT test with flying colors!! D and I were a little nervous, but so excited for the implantation. I took 2 valium and started to feel a little more relaxed than normal so it was time for the impregnation!! It was so beautiful as we watched on the ultrasound screen as they put the perfect embryos into my uterus!! I cried in amazement at the thought of life beginning and them feeling safe and secure as they will always feel! My bladder was full so it would shrink my uterus and "sandwich" the embryos in there and the wish is that they'll "implant" and stick to the wall where they grow and thrive. What a miracle!!

They'll grow the other 10 embies in the incubator for 2-3 days and let us know the report on their grades. They'll freeze the grade 1 &2 embies so hopefully we have some leftover for future children or if we have to do a frozen transfer which isnt as taxing and such a process. We'd skip all the steps so far and go straight to the transfer stage which is what we did today. Once they're frozen, they'll be called our "snowbabies" which is such a cute name!!



Now we wait the long 2-3 weeks for the pg test. oh dear! I wish I could take a 2-3 week nap to make it go by faster!! They told me to take it easy for 2-3 days and Im doing just that. David is waiting on me hand and foot bringing me anything and constantly checking on me and the babies!! It's so cute!!

Want to see the most beautiful sight ever? Here's a picture of one of our embies this morning!!! Their first portrait!!! Today was "best case scenario" and we're very happy and at peace with everything we've been through...no matter the outcome! This has been a miracle in the making bonding us to each other, as well as our friends and family in ways we didn't know possible......We know your prayers were heard! Thank you for caring and loving us with everything in you!! We love you dearly!!!!

TOMORROW IS TRANSFER DAY!!!!!!

OMG! I can't believe I'm even writing this, but tomorrow we will be technically pregnant!! They'll implanting 2 of our strongest embryos and I was told they're ALL doing great!! We'll get their grades tomorrow too. I thought it was today, but they want to watch them in the incubator for another 24 hours to see who emerges as the strongest two! They're all fighting so hard right now to win the prize of becoming our baby!! I just picture them all pushing and elbowing each other out for the top spot!! I just pray that one or both implant safely and securely. I'll tuck them into bed for the very first time and they'll be snuggled right where they belong....feeling safe and secure; just like we want them to always feel!!


The shots we're on now help to make it very sticky and suction-like in my uterus so that's a good thing!! We're probably going to go to mom's tonight so we dont have to drive there and back in one day which is very taxing. We might even stay over there to avoid the drive altogether. OMG! I can't believe how fast this is all happening! Let the prayer chain begin!!! Send sticky babydust our way please! Thanks for caring and loving us through this wild, but fun roller coaster!!

Big Shot Tonight!

From what I've heard from others who went thru IVF, tonight is the biggest and most painful shot!! We begin them tonight and do it each day at the same time until the pg test. If we're pg, then we have to do it for 12 more weeks! YIKES! I hope it's not as bad as what I've heard, but I'll keep you posted! I have 2 targets in my booty drawn with sharpie marker so Dr. D knows just where to dart!! I'll let you know how it goes!! He could poke me in the eye if it meant meeting Baby Hutcheson!! Thanks for caring about all the minute details of this process!!

Soccer Anyone?

WE HAVE TWELVE EMBRYOS!!! That's enough for a soccer team with a sub!!! 2 of my eggs were not mature so they didnt even try to fertilize them so all 12 eggs that were fertilized TOOK!!! They said our fertilization report was 100% successful!! This is best case scenario! Now we wait (heavy sigh) for the "embryo strength report" where they watch the embryos in the incubator to see how they do and give them each a grade of 1-4 tomorrow....1 is the strongest....they'll give us a full report as well as our transfer day on Friday....the waiting continues, but it's good news right now so we can take a breather and celebrate every victory along the way!! We've jumped so many hurdles already and we're so close to the finish line!! I feel like you're right there with us holding our hands!!! LOOK! .........................


There you are!!! ---->

Get Out Your Calculators...

Your favorite little hen worked hard today as I laid 14 eggs!!! FOURTEEN!!! Count em'!! I'm very happy with that #! Although, I'm really anxious to hear about their quality and how many fertilize bc that's what really matters, but IVF is a numbers game and obviously the more eggs you have the better chance you have that some will fertilize. We just need 2 to fertilize, but it'd be nice to have a few extra to sock some away for a rainy day for more children in the future or if we have to do this again. They'll call me tomorrow with the update and tell us our transfer day. It'll be 3-5 days from retrieval as they'll "cook and grow" in the incubator until then.

I was totally out, but D was able to "scrub in" so it was reassuring to have him in there too! He told me the play by play as I was going under. Before they got started, D said I was talking to the Dr about going to the Willie Nelson concert bc Willie was on the radio which I have no recollection of!! Bc I was talking, they upped the drugs in my IV and the rest is history! D said I was even snoring! What the ?? I don't snore!! David was dressed all in blue scrubs, face mask, blue surgical hat, and even blue booties!! He looked so cute! I felt like we were on our way to Kelle's house for a Halloween party!!

D said it was so cool as they put a long needle into each sac like follicle and drained it out hoping there was an egg inside of each sac. (not all sacs/follicles contain an egg). It'd drain into a test tube and they'd bring it to the embryologist by a pass-thru window. Then she'd study the contents and yell out a tallied # if there was an egg inside. D said he was so relieved when she'd yell out a number and when she said "ONE", then the dr. said, "YES! We're on the board!" ha ha He's a very funny guy!! Then the #'s kept going and going. They were coming in so fast that D would hear ONE pause, pause, pause FOUR, pause, pause, pause SEVEN, pause, pause, pause, NINE, pause, pause, pause ELEVEN, pause, pause THIRTEEN - FOURTEEN! They retrieved 14 eggs and will fertilize them tonight!! They said eight eggs is the average for my age so we almost doubled that!! YAA!! They said my quantity is "eggscellent", now we just wait for the quality report. We'll get a call tomorrow morning about the quality and quantity of any embryos created tonight!! The transfer will be 3-5 days from retrieval...I'm feeling very sore and crampy, but that's to be expected...they gave me some great painkillers so I'll be fine!;) Also, D is very catering to my every need so that makes me feel warm and fuzzy all over!! :+)

I went from nervous to downright scared as we got closer to the doctor, but knew how loved and supported we were and it helped to alleviate my fear!! I could feel your prayers, thoughts, and love in my heart and it gave me the strength I needed!! "Thank you" pales in comparison to how grateful I am for you being there for us! It helps and means more than you'll ever know!

I haven't eaten much, but I'm craving some donuts...maybe I'll have a few of these....

OH! LOOK AT THAT!???
There's "FOURTEEN" of them!! ha ha